Where Ever We Find Ourselves

There are two things that strike me about Glen’s message last week.

The first is how easily some of us choose to flee difficulty without thinking though the consequences. Some of us find ourselves facing marital difficulty and our first desire is to get out. We think it will be better and easier. I often sit with people who are contemplating this reality. I try to get them to think down that path a while. One thing that every divorced or blended family will tell you is that there is never a major holiday that doesn’t bear some scar of the broken family. Every Thanksgiving and Christmas, etc. there is the tension about who will be where when. That’s life long, that’s a big deal.

The other thing that struck me is no matter what life hands us or that we create, it’s in our best interest to make the best of our circumstance; to talk out issues, to agree to work together, to resolve and not suppress issues. My wife and I had a long but good talk about an issue we are facing. I wouldn’t put it on the top of the fun to do things list but I was grateful for her willingness to broach it with me and her grace to listen.

Where ever you are in life, what ever life has handed you, embrace it and live up!

Griff

Getting It Right

I have to be honest and it probably won’t surprise any of you but I felt myself well up with emotion several times on Sunday during Glen’s message. When I heard the things that wives were saying about their husbands who were getting it right, something touched me deep inside.

I know, as a man, respect is a huge motivator. When I get anything right and my wife notices and then verbalizes it back to me; WOW! You would have thought I just got the Nobel Peace Prize. I also think as men that is what we are all looking for; to be valued and respected. The reality is we end up looking for it in different places. If we don’t find it at home, or we are too wounded to experience it at home, or we have seen other role models seek it in different ways it can lead to fruitless and destructive searches.

I was appreciative of the encouragement and challenge to “get it right” as a Dad. A word of advice for kids or wives who are reading this: Dad’s need your respect. They live by it and for it. They thrive on it. I don’t know if you have a good or bad relationship with your dad but find something you do and can respect about him and let him know. Write a note, tell him face to face, or get a tattoo; just make sure he knows you respect him. If you do it often enough you will see a new life arise inside him. Before you know it there will be even more you respect about him.

Griff

Relationally Challenged Yet?

It’s been a few weeks since I have “reflected” on the weekend teaching, sorry for my absence.

One thing that has been challenging about this series is that every week we are missing a group of people: dating/married/single/older/younger/ etc. What has surprised me though, is how personally challenged I (and I think everyone else) have been anyway, even when it isn’t directed at me.

Our lives touch and intersect all the time. We really don’t live in a vacuum. It’s really not God’s intention that we do. Every week I am taught in a very direct or indirect way something about myself. I am also given pause for reflection of other people’s relational situations.

If anyone wants to share their direct or indirect learning, feel free.

I want to include a book that I wanted to share the week I taught on dating. It’s simply called “Boundaries in Dating.” I think it will be helpful if that is your world right now. I also want to say that it is in a series of “Boundaries” books that touch just about everyone’s life. They have Boundaries in Marriage, Boundaries with Your Kids, they even have Boundaries with Pets. Just kidding about that one, I think it’s coming out next year.

Seriously, if you have a relational issue you might want to check out one of the corresponding boundary books, or anything by the authors Cloud and Townsend.

I’ll blog at you next week. I promise.

Griff